Attachment Theory
The attachment theory attempts to explain the influence that family dynamics have in creating ones self and how an individual will behave in a relationship. The attachment theory consists of many factors that influence how an individual will behave in a relationship. Ones identity and psyche are shaped by the relationship they have with their caregivers; such as their parents. All individuals have had different parental treatment and responsiveness from their parents as children. It is important for partners in a relationship to be aware of how the other was brought up by their parents because it will have a large impact on how they act in the relationship. Based on the type of attachment that individuals had with their caregivers they are likely going to be one of the four following attachment styles: Secure, Preoccupied, Dissmissive-Avoidant, or Fearful-Avoidant. These attachment styles begin to form at a very young age and carry into adulthood, influencing behavior in interpersonal relationships. Attachment style mainly influences in relationships partner selection, parenting behavior, and lastly communication behavior. It is true that similar styles attract each other, for example, a secure will likely attract a secure. This is because they are the most in common and are able to relate with one another. Problems arise in communication behavior when individuals attract other attachment styles then themselves because they are not similar. If individuals are not with the same attachment style their relationship will not necessarily feature effective communication.
Examples:
Secure Attachment Style: (50%)
"I'm ok, you're ok"
Compromising and problem solving, this type of style leaves individuals able to express emotions in a direct pro-social manner. They are able to provide care and comfort while having high levels of appropriate disclosure.
Preoccupied Attachment Style: (10%)
"I'm not ok, you're ok"
Individuals with this style will likely be demanding, dominating, and express whiny negative behavior. In some instances they will struggle to control their emotions and at times can express high inappropriate levels of self disclosure.
Fearful-Avoidant: (15%)
"I'm not ok, you're not ok"
Individuals with this style will often show negative emotion and have a hard time expressing themselves and being assertive. These individuals also have a low level of self disclosure especially with strangers.
Dismissive Attachment Style: (25%)
"I'm ok, you're not ok"
These individuals will struggle to comfort and console others and will often seem very withdrawn. They also have low levels of self disclosure.
* Percentages are the percent of people that have that attachment style.
Examples:
Secure Attachment Style: (50%)
"I'm ok, you're ok"
Compromising and problem solving, this type of style leaves individuals able to express emotions in a direct pro-social manner. They are able to provide care and comfort while having high levels of appropriate disclosure.
Preoccupied Attachment Style: (10%)
"I'm not ok, you're ok"
Individuals with this style will likely be demanding, dominating, and express whiny negative behavior. In some instances they will struggle to control their emotions and at times can express high inappropriate levels of self disclosure.
Fearful-Avoidant: (15%)
"I'm not ok, you're not ok"
Individuals with this style will often show negative emotion and have a hard time expressing themselves and being assertive. These individuals also have a low level of self disclosure especially with strangers.
Dismissive Attachment Style: (25%)
"I'm ok, you're not ok"
These individuals will struggle to comfort and console others and will often seem very withdrawn. They also have low levels of self disclosure.
* Percentages are the percent of people that have that attachment style.